We had booked a trip to the Sahara with a stop at el Jeb a Roman amphitheatre when we got there we were told to walk straight to the entrance and not stop.

This was because the whole place was surrounded by people trying to sell us Roman coins and artefacts and they were very pushy.

When we got inside it was amazing the atmosphere made your skin tingle you could feel the history and almost smell the animals and the people.

After wandering around and taking pictures, we returned to the coach and headed for the Sahara.

I have always been fascinated by deserts so I was really looking forward to this An ambition would be achieved.

After a while in the coach, we stopped at a roadside shack for refreshments I went to see what was on offer and nearly left with nothing, but hunger made me choose a tuna and chilli french stick wrapped in paper I suffered no stomach upset after eating it. We continued on towards the desert stopping to visit a troglodyte home occupied by a very old lady with startling red hair coloured with natural henna.

We passed through an oasis which was not as I expected it was so big and looked very inhospitable shortly after this we arrived at the Berber camp in the desert from where we would embark on our camel ride to see the sunset over the Sahara.

54 years of working has changed my attitude to working

My time off gives me more pleasure than I was aware

I think I would rather be at home than anywhere 

Walking the dog or pottering in the garden without care

Cycling into town for lunch is not unusual or rare

Thirty years of working in care is probably enough

I think I need to start thinking about my own self-care

It’s just a case of knowing when enough is enough

There are a lot of things to consider such as money

What would I do with all of the time I would have at my disposal?

Would I be able to adjust to a life without work?

Would I find a new routine and what would it look like?

Stepping into the unknown is almost always a cause for concern

Retirement is probably inevitable at some time

I just don’t know when will be the right time for me

I think I will have to capitulate and give it more thought

I took someone to the zoo this week

At all of the creatures we did peek

They sat and looked back at us

From their cages, they just stared blankly

The visit left me feeling very sad for the cruelty of their incarceration

They had committed no crime yet they were still held against their will

Why? For the amusement of the visitors and profits of the owners

Tormented by being able to see what freedom looked like

Birds in cages too small for them to fly in

Sealions in an area of water like a large fishpond

Penguins in an area devoid of any interest as they stood and looked despairingly

Apes that had nothing to do but watch the gawping visitors

For me, the only thing that brightened a sad day was a wild treecreeper 

Climbing a tree in a paddock literally as free as a bird

This is not the first time I have been saddened by a zoo visit

But I have decided I will not visit a zoo again and support these abominations

I’m glad Elons rocket exploded,

I don’t think we need to go to other planets

Mars is not going to feed our starving people

It won’t give shelter to our homeless

It won’t make our society fairer for all

It won’t stop the war in Ukraine 

It won’t bring about peace in the world

It won’t stop global warming in fact the opposite

Why do we want to go and ruin another planet?

When we have not finished ruining this one

We still need to drive the temperature up

To make it uninhabitable for all but the super-rich

We have lots of creatures yet to be driven to extinction

Enough to keep us busy for another fifty years

Leaving behind a barren planet fit for no one 

Perhaps Elon could do something more useful with his billions

As Russia attacks its neighbour bringing death and destruction

On the whim of its lunatic leader’s instruction

It seems to want to destroy all in its path including its civilian population

Why, we ask, only one man knows for sure his people are being lied to?

Fed misinformation by the state broadcasters who are not allowed to tell the truth

Women and children flee from the missile and air attacks that destroy their homes

Old people who cannot leave are dying or being killed, what can we do?

Send money to help the displaced send food and clothing for those that have lost everything

Our government sends arms and weaponry along with many other countries

People offering homes to refugees when they can get through the bureaucracy

NATO cannot help for fear of triggering World War Three and the use of nuclear weapons

Twenty-five per cent of the population of the earth would be killed in the initial strikes of nuclear weapons

It stops us from using them, but would it stop Putin, he probably doesn’t care?

You cannot reason with a madman all we can hope is that his rather hopeless army gets beaten

And then hopefully Ukraine and the rest of the world can spend the next couple of decades trying to rebuild

The next day it was off to the local marina which had a market or souk bought some stuff including a leather holdall which I still have and use. It was not as interesting as I had hoped it would be lots of tat made for the tourist market. On return we went to the beach, which was nice but not being a sunbather, it was not long before I got bored sea and sand as far as the eye could see.

Soon a fat Arab came walking along the beach with a few rugs over his arm he was trying to sell them to anyone on the beach and they were mass-produced rubbish. Unfortunately, my girlfriend asked how much they were a big mistake he was asking some stupid figure which was instantly rejected. This led to a drawn-out conversation or haggle the price came down to about a tenth and she paid. Firstly, in money and by him sneaking a feel of her breast. All for a rug that was probably mass-produced in China or India. I have to say that the locals around the town of souse were not the most likeable people I met in Tunisia. But the Berba that we met in the Sahara were friendly and open

To be continued

.

A holiday in Tunisia seemed just what I needed

A getaway to see places new and feel the sun on my back

All the jabs recommended were done my secret stash of cash was raided

And then Tunisia here we come via Gatwick almost the worst part of the journey

Eventually, we took off and I settled in for the flight, not something I enjoy

As we approached the airport, I could see the runway through the cockpit window

I could also see the stewardess sitting on the arm of the pilot’s seat

We had dived down like a Stuka on a bombing run and overshot the runway

He went round again and this time he managed to land to the detriment of my ears

I was relieved to be on the ground but the pain in my ears was quite severe

One of the other passengers asked if I had seen what happened as he was going to report it

Apparently, the CAA don’t like stewardesses sitting on the pilot’s chair arm when landing

Eventually, after a bus ride, we arrived at the hotel which was almost on the beach

Time for a wander round to get the lie of the land and find the bar and restaurant

Never having travelled much it was all very interesting and not as warm in the evening as expected

We also found out where all the MOT failures end up and become taxis

The next day a trip to the local town was an eyeopener the poverty and police with rifles

People selling individual cigarettes children running up to beg for money

The Arab that accosted us to buy my girlfriend I should have taken the money he would be sorry

Back to the hotel in another wrecked Peugeot at least they weren’t expensive

To be continued

I have no memories of early chidhood friendships only some fondness for some relatives

Standing on the outside of the circle looking in but never belonging inside the rim

Not knowing the rules so never being sure what to do to fit in

A mother who i know loved me but had been orphaned at ten doing the best that she could with the help of Dr Spocks book on child rearing

A father that had learned from a mother with a heart as cold as flint, so a childhood with out hugs or kisses or encouraging words

I neither want or need anyones sypathy for my childhood it just was as it was

It has made me what i am today’a slightly fucked up old man

But with some self analysis and conversations with my late brother i know what my failings are and why i am what i am

A not great father to my kids and probably a not great husband partner call it what you will

I do think that on reflection i am doing the best i can and trying to be a better me

I fail often and for that i have sadness but some things i cannot change

I will carry on trying to be a nicer me less of a loner more of we

I accept that a lot of my failures will never be righted and i will carry to my grave

I have no complaint against my parents like me they did their best

Its time to face up to a basic fact of our new life

Don’t expect to see a doctor unless you’re prepared to pay or want to talk to them on the phone

Don’t expect to see a dentist unless you are in absolute agony

Don’t expect to see an optician in a timely manner two months wait

Don’t expect to see a physiotherapist they are virtual now online only

Our government said the NHS is in safe hands just like a cricketer fielding in boxing gloves

I can go and see a doctor today if I pay forty-nine pounds, but I can’t see my own

Is this privatisation by stealth I really don’t know all I do know is that many people will die?

Through ailments being missed, you can’t tell by phone if someone is suffering

Surely, it’s the visual clues that alert them to ailments that the patient isn’t even aware of

My eye test is overdue by eleven months because the opticians are not sending out reminders

Physio is done by filling in an online form and then you get an email attachment with exercises to try

I haven’t been offered a video call I suppose because they don’t want us to know they are working from home

My tooth broke last night but I don’t suppose ill get an appointment any time soon I’m not in agony yet alone absolute agony

Oh well at least I’ve got Dr Google in case I need an emergency appendectomy I can watch a video and do it myself

It creeps in through any gap a window on the latch

A door not fully closed its cold fingers seeping in

It’s not freezing, mild for the time of year they say

But as the darkness closes in, by four pm the cold encroaches

A day of activity dog walks clearing the garden activity that keeps us warm

As the winter sun sets, we retreat indoors turn the thermostat up

Maybe soon it will be time to light an evening fire as we watch tv

The comforting glow gives a feeling of wellbeing as we stare into the flames

Winter marches on an inevitable force that cannot be controlled only accepted

We are fortunate we have the technology and the wealth to survive and thrive

We can be comfortable in even the severest of weather that nature throws our way

Pity those that cannot turn up a thermostat huddled in a shack wearing all the clothes they own

Sitting on the Polish border looking at a world of opportunity just yards across a fence

Being soaked by water canons and sprayed by pepper spray and tear gas

In a bid to reach a better life away from fear and repression and poverty

Just a pawn in the sick game that Putin and his puppet Lukashenko are playing